A certain zoo had acquired a very rare species of gorilla.
 
 Within a few weeks the gorilla, a female, became very ornery, and
 difficult to handle. Upon examination, the zoo veterinarian
 determined the problem: she was in heat. What to do? There was no
 male of this species available.
 
 While reflecting on their problem, the zoo administrators noticed
 Mike, an employee responsible for cleaning the animals' cages.
 
 Now Mike, it was rumoured, possessed ample ability to satisfy any
 female, and he wasn't very bright. So the zoo administrators
 thought they might have a solution. Perhaps they could entice Mike
 to satisfy the female gorilla.
 
 So he was approached with a proposition: would he be willing to
 have sex with the gorilla for $500. He responded that he was
 interested but would have to think the matter over.
 
 The following day, Mike announced that he would accept their
 offer, but only under three conditions: 
  
 "First," he said, "I don't want to have to kiss her," and "Second,
 I want nothing to do with any offspring that may result from this
 union."
 
 The zoo administration quickly agreed to these conditions, but
 what could be the third?
 
 "Well," said Mike, "You've gotta give me another week to come up 
 with the five hundred bucks."